"Why in the world would anybody put chains on me?"
Chances are, if you're living in the Age of COVID, you're probably reading this at home.
Welcome to living a "No Wake Life"
It's what we called it back in 2013- https://docksixchronicles.blogspot.com/2013/03/another-dock-diatribe-debut.html
it's still true today.
Since the link is intermittent, here it is: